Book Review XVIII: Marriage From Surviving to Thriving


Yoo, another post on book review! Haven’t posted any review in a while!
A book I purchased during Dec sale season.
Yeah, this is another book on relationship. Not bad, I have invested a lot on this matter.

Charles and Cynthia have been married for more than 50 years. Their marriage has gone from surviving to thriving.
Here, Charles shares some insight on a thriving marriage.

Chapter 1
The world has changed so much that the role of husband and wife blurred.
Sense of right and wrong has been weakened through continual display of lawlessness in the media.
Nevertheless, there is a key to survive: our relationship with God. Let us apply our relationship with God in our marriage.

Chapter 2
Marriage is God’s idea when He created Adam and Eve. Adam was so overjoyed as Eve complimented his weakness.
In His design, the couple should put and rely on each other more than their parents. The couple should be permanently married to each other.
In God’s design, the couple do not lose their individual personality. Instead, their personality move in harmony.
The couple then enjoy intimacy, which is shared joy, grief and commitment.
Unfortunately, sin ruins God’s design. The couple became self conscious and self absorbed, they withdrew from each other and they ran from God.
A couple lose their intimacy as they shift blame on one another.
Nevertheless, they can regain it by confessing the truth and taking responsibility.

Chapter 3
The key to a permanent marriage is commitment.
Commitment helps the couple last through the difficult circumstance, difficult consequence of wrong decision, or big conflict.
Finally, Christ has to be in the center of marriage.

Chapter 4
To make a marriage stick, the couple should cultivate honesty,
express anger in a appropriate way at the right time, give to spouse what is rightfully his/hers, guard our speech, and be nice.

Chapter 5
While commitment keeps the couple side by side, love is the glue which bonds them.
It is not just any kind of eros (taking) love, it should be a kind of agape (giving) love.
In practice, we should write down the love action, risk it often and do it now.

Chapter 6
Characteristics of a healthy family include:
(1) the members of household are committed to one another,
(2) they spend time together,
(3) they enjoy open and frequent communication,
(4) they turn inward during a time of crisis,
(5) the members express affirmation and encouragement,
(6) they share spiritual commitment,
(7) they trust each other,
(8) they enjoy freedom and grace.
The last 3 chapters of Ephesians provide guidelines on building a healthy family.

Chapter 7
Many marriage start strong.
However, as time goes by, little marital erosion may occur here and there until eventually marriage collapses.
It is important for the couple to fix every little erosion to prevent its harmful accumulation.

Chapter 8
Old age doesn’t necessarily remove sense of fun from any marriage.
Aging is often accompanied with sense of uselessness, self pity, fear and inappropriate remorse.
However, we don’t have to succumb to those negative feelings even when we are old.
We can always choose to keep exercising our mind, enjoying life, developing strength, pursuing opportunities, and seeking God.

I am not sure if The Ink Room still carries this book in stock.
If it does, do grab a copy of it, ok? Winking smile

Posted April 27, 2013 by Jefri Yue Fei 吴岳飞 in Book Review, Charles R. Swindoll

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