Archive for April 2016

Verse of the Day: God Avenging Speedily

And shall God not avenge His own elect who cry out day and night to Him,
though He bears long with them?

I tell you that He will avenge them speedily.
Nevertheless, when the Son of Man comes, will He really find faith on the earth?”

– Luke 18:7-8, NKJV –

A certain friend gave testimony on closing a sales deal.
He could not secure the deal until last minute.
As he was about on the verge of giving up, all of sudden the sales came in.

In this verse, God will avenge speedily as long as His people keep praying and do not give up.
Pastor Tan Ye Peng preached before that “speedily” also means “suddenly”.
Indeed, many times God suddenly grants the prayer when we think all hope is lost.
In fact, we heard the saying too:
God may not be early but He is never late.

Recently, I experienced a certain difficulty.
I really thought I was a goner. Really.
I prayed and prayed and yet I thought all the doors were closed on me.
I was ready to accept my “fate” and was about to execute the emergency plan.

And, suddenly!!! In a lightning flash!!! God helped me!!!
I was at loss. Could not mutter a word to express my gratitude.
All the hope came back to life just from one incidence!!!

Can’t share the details now.
I want to complete the whole process first.

Anyway, dear readers, do keep praying unceasingly, yeah?
You never know when the LORD will help you.

Soundtrack of the Day: Asura’s Wrath

The story of an angry demigod. The angrier he was, the stronger he became.
Why was he angry? Because other demigods made her daughter suffer.
They killed her wife and kidnapped her daughter.

Nevertheless, deep beneath such a terrible fury was his love for his daughter.
Kinda remind me of a certain verse in the Bible regarding the love of the Heavenly Father.
But, that will be post for another time.

Nice soundtrack from one of the episodes of Asura’s Wrath.
Been listening to this particular soundtrack almost everyday.
Sounds like Naruto ~~~ Enjoy!!!

Posted April 28, 2016 by Jefri Yue Fei 吴岳飞 in Video

Church Service 23, April, 2016

A fantastic church service last Saturday!!
We watched appreciation from Pastor Kong and Pastor Sun to all the CG leader and ex CG leaders.
Both of them thanked the leaders for all the hard work in the ministry, especially in the past 5 years.

A friend, Rio, received the appreciation!
It is a photo of the church service in Suntec!!

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Pastor Kong and Pastor Sun then preached about relationship builder.
Well, I have posted the summary of their sermon.

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Dinner time at Pepperoni Pizza!!
Learned a lot from the couple as they taught me important life lessons!
Maybe I need to interview more couple to learn from them too? ~~~
Do look forward to the next post ~~

CG Meeting 22, April, 2016

*** Thanks a lot, Rio, for the awesome photos!!! ***

A great CG meeting last week!
Filled with the presence of God, the word of God and the wonderful fellowship!!
Here it goes the sermon ~~

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Mission statement distinguishes one company from another.
For example, LinkedIn connects people.

What is our mission as a church?
”To build a church with strong spiritual atmosphere of faith and purity…” 
This mission has to be our DNA so we can move together as one big family.
There is a meaning behind every part of this mission.

To build a church with strong spiritual atmosphere of faith and purity

Strong spiritual atmosphere: the members are hungry and thirsty to seek the LORD.
Purity: CHC is going through difficult time. The members are purified.
There are not many churches with strong spiritual atmosphere like CHC.
Let us not take this spiritual atmosphere for granted.
Even as we go through daily work, we must still maintain the strong spiritual atmosphere.
Rm 10:17
Faith can only come from hearing the word of God.
We need to hear the word from God to build our faith.
Psalm 119:9
By taking heed of the word of the LORD, our faith is purified.
We should not read the Bible just for the sake of reading.

where every member is released into ministry

Ministry. It is not something we must do.
Ministry is the way to maturity 
Ephesians 4:11-13
As we minister, our spirit matures in the LORD.
In fact, ministry becomes our delight. It is no longer a burden.

discipled in the Great Commandment

Matt 22:36-40
It is to love the LORD and to love neighbor.
Disciple = follower or student of a mentor.
As Christians, our Mentor is Lord Jesus. Whatever Lord Jesus said, we need to carry out.
When Lord Jesus was alive, He was ready to die because He loves us.
In turn, we love Lord Jesus too.
Our capacity to love others should grow day by day too.

to obey the Great Commission and the Cultural Mandate

Matt 28:16-20
How to obey the Great Commission without going? It is good if we sign up on a mission trip.
Great Commission is almost like His will before He left us.
We can also start by praying for others and helping them.
If we have the chance to pray even for non-believers, we should do it.

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Fellowship time.. began!!!

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Tasty chocolate! Supply of calorie for me to leap down the staircase.
Had fun face swapping with a fellow CG member too ~~
We laughed hysterically and unstoppably.

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Our pretty and handsome CG members!
Do look forward to the next happening of the CG, ok? ^_^

Pastor Kong’s and Pastor Sun’s Sermon 23, April, 2016 Relationship Builder Series Part 4

1 Pet 3:8-9
Do not repay insult with insult, but with blessing.
Keep tongue from evil.
Seek peace and pursue it.

Marriage is the most complex relationship.
If we can handle marriage, we can handle any other relationship.
There are many conflicts in marriage. There are 2 types: solvable problems and perpetual problems.

We do not have to solve all perpetual problems for marriage to thrive.
However, when perpetual problems get serious, we need to do something about it. We can’t just laugh it off.
Signs of serious perpetual problems include: 
– Rejection
– Condemning

Perpetual problems sometimes come to gridlock: being stuck to the frustration where no progress can be made.
We need to move from gridlock to dialogue.

The cause of perpetual problems: Dreams which are not addressed or respected.
Our dream is formed in our youth. When we are married, we want to recreate that dream.

Pastor Kong and Sun have perpetual problem of ministry philosophy.
Pastor Kong wants to emphasize overseas mission. Pastor Sun wants to emphasize to local mission ministry.
This difference can be traced back to the youth season.
Pastor Sun had a loving mother who took care of 5 kids. Hence, she wants to ‘mother’ CHC well too.
Pastor Kong grew up in small church. In this church, a missionary was considered the ultimate hero.
In this difference, they do not allow perpetual problem to become gridlock.

Gridlock kills relationship.
Gridlock is the sign of important dream which is not yet addressed.
Without this dream, we feel meaningless.

Some dreams are simple, e.g. to clear home mortgage.
However, behind this dream, there is greater dream: feeling security about future.
Some dreams are profound.
While the dreams are good, when it is not addressed, it will create perpetual problem.

Proverb 13:12
When the dreams are not addressed, we become frustrated.
Helping each other realize dreams is major goal of marriage.
Proverb 3:27
Many times it is in the spouse’s power to realize the other spouse’s dream.

Marriage is the husband supporting wife’s dream and the wife supporting husband’s dream.
Husband and wife must tell each other what they want in life.

3 steps to handle perpetual problem (to break the gridlock):

1. Become a dream detective

What is the lifelong dream of husband and of wife?
What is his/her aspiration?
Once we are married, it does not mean we bury our individual dream.
We must talk about the dream, even if the dream feels childish.

Example of conflict #1
The husband is not so concerned with cleanliness. The wife is concerned with cleanliness all the time.
Perhaps during his youth, the husband was controlled under his parents. He then dreamed of his freedom.
Perhaps during her youth, the wife grew up in chaotic family. She then dreamed of order in the family.

Example of conflict #2
The husband wants sex. The wife is too tired for sex.
Perhaps during her youth, she was sexually mistreated. She felt sex was ok during her term when she was ready.
Perhaps during his youth, he wants his wife to feel sexually attracted to him. He wants to feel that for the wife he is irresistible.

2. Communicate thoughts and feeling clearly and honestly

What do we feel about it? What is the dream and why is it important?
Spouse must never downplay spouse’s dream and feeling.

James 1:19
Don’t interrupt, don’t judge the dream.
Listen the way a good friend would listen.

Proverb 15:4
When a friend shares with us, we listen as a good friend.
We do not have to agree or participate in spouse’s dream.
Nevertheless, we listen with respect. How do we listen with respect: 

a. Be understanding and interested in the dream

Proverb 24:3, Phil 2:3
We must be interested in spouse’s dream

b. Offer financial support

c. Be a part of the dream

Even if we do not want to be a part of the dream, we can at least honor it.

3. End the gridlock

Rm 12:18
To live peaceable = to declaw the issue.
We take away the sting. We declaw by separating it into 2 categories:

1. Issues we can’t give in to
Non-negotiable. Core values. This area has to be as small as possible.

2. Issues we can be flexible about
This area has to be as big as possible.

We have to learn to compromise with grace.
We need to turn gridlock into dialogue.

Example of conflict #3:
The wife wants to move close to her parents. The husband does not want to relocate.
Perhaps in her youth, she had a happy childhood.
Perhaps in his youth, he saw his grandparents living in destitute. He wants to have financial security for his retirement.
What is the non-negotiable area for the wife? The place has to be near her parents.
What is the flexible area for the wife? It does not have to be condo.
What is the non-negotiable area for the husband? He wants to have saving.
What is the flexible area for the wife? The saving account does not have to come immediately.

It will take some time to end the gridlock

After marrying for many years, we may feel non-excitement.
Perhaps we should move on to deeper shared meaning.
Two soulmates become one by creating inner life together.

Gen 1:27
God honors individuality of male and female. Adam and Eve had their own dreams.
Nevertheless, God blessed them.

Shared meaning does not mean couple sees eye to eye to everything.
shared meaning means convictions, values, goals and dreams are known and celebrated.

Christians should have the best marriage life which is like heaven on earth.

Posted April 25, 2016 by Jefri Yue Fei 吴岳飞 in Kong Hee, Sermon, Sun Ho

Home-cooked Dinner!!!

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Had not had dinner at home for a loooooong time.
Finally today I gotta enjoy my god-mommy’s superb dinner!!!
Rice cooked with coconut milk.
Sour chilil and spicy curry. I finished one third of the cucumber and lady finger.
Healthy and yyummmmmmyyyyyy!!!!

Posted April 24, 2016 by Jefri Yue Fei 吴岳飞 in Food, Photo of the Day

Verse of the Day: Lazy vs Diligent Person

The lazy person claims, “There’s a lion out there!
If I go outside, I might be killed!”
(Proverb 22:13, NLT)

And so, what will a diligent person say? Maybe he/she will say,
”There’s a lion out there! Let’s do something about it!”

Perhaps he/she will shoot the lion with an arrow or shout for help or throw poisoned meat to the lion.
The bottom line is that in a difficult time, a lazy person comes up with an excuse to run away from it whereas a diligent person comes up with a solution to solve it.

By God’s grace, we are problem solvers!

Posted April 23, 2016 by Jefri Yue Fei 吴岳飞 in Thought, Verse of the Day

Pastor Kong’s and Pastor Sun’s Sermon 17, April, 2016 Relationship Builders Part 3

Marriage is a complicated relationship between 2 people.
There are disagreements, preferences and conflicts.
After all, 2 people cannot agree all the time.
Some conflicts are minor irritants. Other conflicts can be overwhelming.

2 types of conflicts: those can be resolved and those cannot be resolved.

1. Perpetual and unsolvable conflict

Argument over same issues again and again.
For example,  the way to rise children, the frequency of sexual intimacy and when to have kids.
Pastor Kong and Sun themselves have constant arguments over ministry.
Pastor Kong wanted to emphasize mission a lot more.
Pastor Sun wanted to emphasize the spiritual growth of the home base (that is CHC)

We do not have to resolve all perpetual problems for marriage to thrive.
In fact, if we can have a sense humor, we can handle this perpetual conflict.

But, when do we really need to deal with unsolvable conflict?

1. We feel rejected by our partner
2. We condemn each other during conversations.
3. We are unwilling to compromise.
4. We disengage from each other emotionally.

How do we deal with unsolvable conflict? Pastor Kong and Sun will cover it in the next weekend’s sermon.

2. Solvable problems

This is less heart wrenching.
Hence, we need to solve it head on.

Sometimes, solvable problems escalate to become perpetual problems.
This is due to perpetual problem: big underlying issue of hidden, deeper issues in disputes.

Solvable problems involve no hidden, deeper issue in disputes.
We can solve solvable problems: we need to handle them with good manners and respect.
There must no shouting match.
Very often, we handle friends and acquaintances with manners and respect.
However, we often don’t handle spouses with the same manners and respect.

John 13:34, Rm 5:5, 1 Cor 13:4-5
We are already equipped for this.
The Holy Spirit pours God’s love to us and helps us to love others.

Often in the heat of the argument, we use hurtful words to our spouses.
We also often remember spouses’ past mistake.
This will just make solvable conflict worse

Eph 4:31
Clamor = yelling, screaming, shouting.
To God, yelling is as bad as bitterness.
When we are angry, we often do not give spouse a chance to speak.

Proverb 13:3
A quick interruption can ruin everything

Col 4:6
As Christians, we must always communicate in love even when the spouse does not deserve it.

4 things that almost guarantees a divorce:

1. Criticism
Especially when we want to get to the bottom of the issue

2. Contempt
Disrespectful of each other.

3. Defensiveness

4. Stone walling
Switched off, refusing to confront the issues.
Emotional distance will widen. Spouses live separate lives.
Most couples divorce when they give up on friendship which is the bedrock of marriage.

5 steps to solve solvable conflict:

1. We should soften our start up
Proverb 15:1
Most discussions end on the same note as they begin with.
We do not attack the person.
Harsh start up: gradual build up of complaints or frustrations (that have been ignored). How to have soft start up?

– Be gentle. Calm down. God’s gentleness gives us rest. Our gentleness gives our spouse rest. Don’t discuss it until we calm down.
– Don’t use sweeping statements such as: never, always, everyday, everyone.
– Complain but don’t blame. Focus on the problem, not on the person.
– Be appreciative. Say: “Thank you” “I appreciate”
– Start with “I” and not “You”. “You” is a attack word.
– Don’t store things up. Don’t take too long to revisit the issue. Deal with it asap. If we store things up too long, they will resurface in an ugly way. We can be angry and not sin.

2. We make effective repair attempts.

Emotional “brakes” to prevent discussion from worsening.
When the argument is heated,  we need to apply the brake before the argument escalates into world war 3.
We listen to the words, not just the tone.
Following are the words which function as emotional brake.

Calming down
– This is important to me. Can you try to understand?
– Please help me to understand.
Feeling hurt
– Dear, I am getting scared.
– Did I do something wrong?
– Please don’t lecture me.
Feeling sorry
– I can see my part in all this
– My reactions were too extreme. Sorry.
Getting convinced
– I never thought of things that way.
– I see what you are talking about.
Urgently stopping
– I might be wrong here

3. Keep calm

When our heart beats too fast, we can’t think clearly.
We then should calm down.

4. Compromise

We need to compromise. It is giving up a certain individual right for the bigger picture of happy marriage.

Happy Marriage = husband’s happiness + wife’s happiness

Compromise is possible if we have done the previous 3 steps.
To compromise, we need to keep open mind to consider spouse’s point of view.
Compromise only works in positive environment. It does not work in yelling environment.

5. Become tolerant of each other’s faults

We need to be willing to accept spouse’s idiosyncrasies just like spouses accept ours.

To be loving Christians, it does not mean we become spineless and become door mats.
Love means we do not have to be right all the time.

Posted April 22, 2016 by Jefri Yue Fei 吴岳飞 in Kong Hee, Sermon, Sun Ho

Reflection on Doctorate Journey Part 2: Connection

“Wargreymon. Metalgarurumon. They digivolved together to become… Omnimon!
– Digimon the Movie –

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Side Story:

The heroes, Wargreymon and Metalgarurumon, were outnumbered by countless copies of Diaboromon, the villain.
As they were at the brink of defeat, something strange happened.
Emails sent by millions and millions of children around the world to support and encourage them suddenly engulfed them.
Immediately, both of them were revived and merged with the emails, transforming them into Omnimon.
Omnimon then easily defeated the villain.

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It is said that no man is an island. Absolutely it is true for a doctorate journey.
In what way? I am glad you ask.

Most of the time a PhD student has to work alone.
Yup, that’s the daily routine. Solitude. Isolation. Loneliness.
Being cut off from the rest of the world for most of the journey.
Definitely it is not healthy in terms of mental well being.

A PhD student needs friends, both inside and outside the group.
Three important benefits of friendship in PhD student’s life.

Firstly, the obvious one.
Friends are there for fun.
Doctorate work is pretty stressful and a PhD needs to relieve stress by sharing happy moments with his/her friends.

Secondly, he/she can discuss the project with the friends.
After all, his/her supervisor may not be available for discussion most of the time.
In some cases, a PhD student can only meet his/her supervisor in a group meeting.
Those friends can give idea and constructive criticism before he/she presents the work to the supervisor.

Thirdly, access to instrument.
When I was doing PhD, there were various instruments which I did not have access to use.
Luckily, my friends from other groups were there to open the door for me and teach me how to use the instrument.
Better still, it was not even collaboration project.
And best, if there is queue to use a certain instrument, my friends were to help me cut the queue.

Seeing all these benefits, I am convinced there is no way a PhD student can complete his doctorate in time all by himself/herself.
In addition, I don’t like it when there is politics in the research group.
Instead of shooting each other down, why don’t they just help each other complete their PhD work?

There must be no politics in the lab. Similarly, there must be no office politics wherever I work now.

Connection. Friendship.
It is important everywhere.

Posted April 21, 2016 by Jefri Yue Fei 吴岳飞 in Doctorate, Thought

Robert and Santy Wedding 16, April, 2016

As promised, here was what happened on last Saturday evening ~~~
A couple in the CG got married!!! And, the venue was in Halia Raffles Hotel.
Didn’t take many photos during the holy matrimony.
Nevertheless, here are the photos of the wedding reception ~~

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RS = Robert and Santy.
Believe it or not, the wedding organizers, helpers, MC, singer and musician are all church members and most of them are fellow CG members.
Man! Whoever did the decoration really did a great job! (Hint: it was not me)

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Dinner started!!!
Well, of all the menu, the ones which really excited cg members are the ice cream and the french fries.
See that bean sprout. One friend passed it to another friend, saying “It is for you so you will stay fertile (to have kids).”
HEHEHE!!
And us usual, they passed the foods they could not finish to me.
Man, my tummy was about to explode that night!

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Stole this photo from facebook. See our happy faces?

Congratulations once again, Robert and Santy!
Have a blissful marriage life!

[My turn is gonna come soon too to get married. Amen for that!]

Posted April 21, 2016 by Jefri Yue Fei 吴岳飞 in Cell Group, Food, Wedding